Dear Heat Twitter, Your Time Has Come
I hope your thumbs have had their training during this regular season because the time has come. The playoffs have returned to our beloved American Airlines Arena. The postseason will highlight your talents, quickness, endurance, vines, hot takes, and most importantly, meme originality.
It’s been more than a year since Heat Twitter has entered playoff territory, so I have high expectations for all of you. Not because it’ll be win or deactivate, but because you’ve proven to be the best fan base in this wonderful Twitter world.
The whole nation will be watching, waiting to silence you, waiting to refute your tweets, waiting to put a Jordan crying face on you every chance they get. But I know you will all prevail. Why? Because eighty-two games later and you’re still here, cheering on the Miami Heat.
From the Heat Twitter president, whichever it may be in your heart, to the egg avi that randomly favorites Heat Twitter memes – you’ve all laughed, screamed, and cried through these eighty-two games.
The Heat’s run for the championship may be a tough one, it may even be cut short, but your tweets will live forever.
In the words of a Cleveland reporter “get off the cocaine, stop doing the blow in the bathroom,” and get serious because this is the time you prove your Twitter talent.
They’ve called you bullies, posers and bad fans. They’ve claimed you don’t know the rules of the game (learn the game), that you don’t even know how to root for your team. They assume you’re a bunch of women with fake boobs chanting at a basketball court.
You may be superficial, obnoxious and possibly not the greatest people but dammit if you’re not the best fans on Twitter.
Some people “can’t even count” how many championships the Miami Heat have won, but they can sure count how many times you tweeted “He Gone.”
You’re rich, you have sun, you have nice weather, good restaurants, and best of all you have so much cocaine to concentrate on your Tweeting.
It’s time to crack your knuckles, pick up your mojito and phone, and obnoxiously rub all of Heat Twitter’s glory in their faces.
Because it’s playoffs time and I know you’ll turn Twitter White Hot. Dale.